Up. 6 am, say it ain’t so. Get kid A ready and off to school and kid B up so we can leave. Leave?! I’m not use to leaving this early. It’s coffee time, not drive time. Are my eyes even ready for this? If this kid screams in that carseat and tries to free herself, I might leave her on the side of the road, tied to a tree. I’ll swing back by and pick her up.
Apparently the FF left his debit card in my truck. He went on shift yesterday am. He has no cash. No one takes checks anymore at gas stations. Apparently his truck is on E and by on E I mean OMG FEED ME NOW on E and I have to make like a 45 mile round trip adventure at the crack of dawn to take the stupid little silver rectangular piece of plastic to him because if I don’t he will run out of gas before making it home and on to his next 24 hr shift in the next town. WTFreak. WTFrazzle. WTfunkmaster. Someone call the Key Master, I’m feeling kinda like Zuul this morning.
Now, dare I let his happen and I would have heard a mouthful. *Insert manly end of the world type rant here* <— THAT is what I would have heard. I shall just smile and nod. Even though my feelings were thoroughly hurt when it isn't even my fault to start with. Why get testy with ME over a mistake YOU made? I know he doesn't mean to take it out on me. I will let is slide. If I wasn't so good at holding my tongue, I'd of whipped out a couple of four letter words and told him where to stick them all, which would most likely be a small three letter word. I will hold my tongue. I WILL hold my tongue. I WILL HOLD MY TONGUE!
Lesson #55876 You have to do things that you don't want to do because your FF is a, for the lack of better words at this time of morning, a big fat doodoo head and you have no option. Just suck it up, do it and dream about plucking his leg hairs one at the time.
The other option is smothering him in his sleep, but I am too fragile for prison.
Please do not take that seriously, this is a wadded-panty free zone! It’s all jokes. Mostly.